When asked why their marriage is on the rocks, many couples often state that they have just grown apart.
The reality of that statement just means the individuals no longer relate to or appreciate each other as they once did.
This damage often occurs over a period of months or years and it is not even realized until it becomes a serious issue, which often escalates the marital problems even further.
It is the purpose of this article to expose some of the underlying reasons for "growing apart" with hopes that this knowledge can prevent the situations from happening.
1. Lack of communication.
Every day life is moving at such a fast pace these days that it seems people are forgetting to “stop and smell the coffee” or rather stop and tell their spouse that they love them and appreciate them.
Or even simpler than that, they forget to mention that they are cooking dinner on a certain night or are planning to mow the yard later.
Saying those few words can lessen the stress of every day responsibilities and create a happier home and relationship.
2. Too much talking and not enough listening.
Okay, so maybe people do say some of the little things above but your partner may be too busy to remember. This is why listening often plays a more important role than talking.
I mean, what’s the point of talking if no one is listening? The next time you and your spouse are talking, listen to what he or she is saying.
If it happens to be, “Hey, I’m cooking dinner Thursday night,” you can say something back like, “Great! What are we having?”
The next most important step is remembering your plans!
If your memory tends to fail you, write it down.
A Post-It on your work surface or a note in you day planner will work fine; just as long as you see it daily so when Thursday afternoon comes, you’ll know where you’ll need to be in a few hours.
3. Lack of attention.
This ties in with listening to your spouse. Sometimes people hear things and it “goes in one ear and out the other.”
But try this… if your spouse is telling you about a project either work related or something he or she is taking on personally, ask him or her about the progress a few days after hearing the news.
Once the subject comes up enough, your spouse will want to tell you something new that they learned.
Even if you have no interest or just no clue about the matter, you can still give him or her the attention they deserve.
If you don’t know what to say, a simple, “Wow; you learn something new everyday,” or “I’m proud of you,” will be sufficient.