So here’s my (proven effective!) solution to this pesky little problem: It’s called The Insecurity Blanket.
Rather than acting like an emotional basket case when a problem arises, it’s better to share your insecurities before they become an active problem.
Put aside your pride (The deadliest of the 7 Deadly Sins… and commonly known as “The root of evil”) for about 20 minutes, and talk frankly about what fears lurk in your subconscious.
You can admit to your girlfriend that you get jealous when you see her strutting around in a mini-skirt and guys flock to her as though she were a walking beer tap.
Trust me, she gets jealous too. Every time a girl giggles at one of your jokes and touches your arm affectionately, she feels the urge to grab that girl by her ponytail and fling her violently into the wall.
Better listening = better communication = better understanding,which paves the way for more intimacy (READ: better sex!).
Insecurity Blanket How-To
You can’t just blurt out something like: “I hate it when you act slutty!” Heed caution with the words you choose, and most importantly is the location which you choose to divulge these thoughts.
Mutually decide on a time and place each week or month for both of you to lie down beside each other and share each other's concerns, fears, and personal insecurities.
You can do this in bed, laying under the covers together, hence the title of the exercise – the Insecurity Blanket.
A "security blanket" is a colloquial term used to describe something that someone uses to dispel anxiety.
The “IN-security blanket” is a metaphor for an intimate place where two people can share their personal insecurities without fear of being judged or ridiculed. In other words: Location, location, location!
Hara Estroff Marano of Psychology Today Magazine says: "Sex is good. Pillow talk is better. Sex is easy; intimacy is difficult. It requires honesty, openness and self-disclosure, confiding concerns, fears, sadness as well as hopes and dreams".
This is why if you and your partner seek shelter underneath the "insecurity blanket" at least once a month, your personal insecurities will not compound into resentment towards your partner or your relationship, and make for a blissful, happy life together. Isn’t that why you’re in a relationship in the first place?
About the Author:
"Jack of all trades and master of none"... Luigi Di Serio is an ad hoc, freelance writer and web site developer who owns over 100 web sites! He holds a degree in Urban Planning and specializing in strategic business intelligence, security, espionage, sociology and human interactionism (includingrelationship). www.diserio.com.