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Surviving After Divorce

The sooner you accept this, the sooner you will be able to find happiness again.

5. Don't live in the past.

No doubt you've got some great memories from your time together, you would never have stayed together as long as you did if there were never any good times.

Remember them by all means, but don't dwell on them.

If you find yourself wishing that everything could be "like that" again, give yourself a mental slap and remind yourself that there are some fantastic moments waiting for you in the future and that the past is nothing but a memory.

You can learn from it but you can't change it or return to it. It's over. Gone. The future is what you should be thinking about now!

6. Don't drown yourself in guilt.

You've probably said a few things that you didn't mean and now regret but you can't change that now. By all means apologize to your ex if it'll make you feel better, but don't expect your apology to change anything. Forgive yourself and learn from your mistakes.

7. Re-discover yourself!

How much of yourself did you give up during your relationship?

Did you find yourself bending over backwards to satisfy your partner?

Now is the time to start living for you!

Doing the things that make YOU happy will increase your self-confidence.

Get a new hair-cut, re-arrange the furniture, enroll on a course. Do anything you like, but do it for YOU.

8. Sort out your finances.

Your financial situation is bound to have changed and it's important that you know exactly how much you have coming in.

It's easy to start over-spending while you're wallowing in your self-pity.

A little extra indulgence here and another there; it's easy to fall into the trap so don't be tempted.

Getting yourself into debt will just make your life as a single woman unnecessarily difficult.

If your income is low (or non-existent) contact Social Services Benefits Advice Service or your local Citizens Advice Bureau. They will have somebody available to assess your needs and help you claim any benefits that you may be eligible for.


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